It's ME

Listener WANTED (:

2012-01-26T07:12:00.000-08:00

Sometimes i wish i could have a listener.
A listener who is willing to lend out his/ her ears whenever i need.
A listener who could give me opinion or advice.
A listener who is willing to keep my things as secret.

Smile is the easiest way to hide the pain.
Look at me closely.
You will see the girl I am just isn't me. Maybe...sometimes.
Don't worry, i'm okay. Teehee. :)

Need a listener, but not speaker nor amplifier.
Is a pair of ears to listen but not a mouth to share out my things.
I know it's diffcult to find.
Well, but I know one day i could find you. *Finger crossing. :)

Good night. Happy friday my friend. :D

Holidays turn into...study week

2011-12-30T06:33:00.000-08:00

Here i come! Time flies like an arrow, first semester in my course finished. Homework, group projects, paperwork, report, assignment.. Omg! No wonder i have no social life. Start studying for finals, but i think my photographic memory card now is totally full. Urgh, my brain has exploded from too much info.

And I just want to say :

This is the way how i study. Okay i know, ignore my messy hair please. Hahaha.

The best ever medicine when stress comes. I need them always, thank you Vitagen. (:

Owh ohh, break time finished. Time to study.. Bye.:(

［一年前的事］

2011-07-28T02:26:00.000-07:00

一年了，外婆不在我们身边的日子一年了，亲人们心里想问的问题都一样，都是那一句，过得还好吗? 回想去年刚过完自己的生日后，不久残酷的事实就找上门，人生往往乐中带悲，所以那一年的生日愿望没实现，永远也不。

五月十九号，是外婆动手术的那一天，也是我考试的一天。那考试对我很重要，手术对她更重要。我们都紧张，她的心情我们无法了解，痛苦我们无法分担，无助的我们只能心疼，除了鼓励，什么都帮不了。她终于接受了医生的意见，这意见给了很久，以前的她都拒绝。手术前几天，我明白了。外婆是个传统的女人，她很相信神，神给的答案却不理想，一去不回。站在分叉路口，面对左右选择的她，换作是你，该怎么办？一个没有答案的问题。

手术前一晚，我打个电话给她加油，要她一定要撑下去。她很可爱，我还没开口，就问我吃饱了没，不要太迟睡......原来，那是我们的最后一通电话。:'( 机会不常常有，而我却再也没机会了。

当天考完试，外婆才正准备进手术房，那时觉得好庆幸，心想：赶得及，赶得及。房门一开，一眼看到的就是一个好慈祥的笑容，让人的心里觉得好舒服，印象好深刻。"都说不用来了，干嘛还赶来" "哎呀，医院离学校很近，走路五六分钟就到了，很快的"。那一段走去手术房的路是外婆自己走的，也是我最后一次在她的后面看她自己走路。到了手术房时，她的笑容是勉强的，紧张的心情都表露在脸上。她最疼二舅了，看着二舅紧紧握着外婆的手说，"我们都在外面为你加油"，那时的外婆，是勇敢的。

有些难关不是一次就能成功，有了第一次手术就会有第二，第三..... ；不乐观的事接二连三地发生，她的身体就再也撑不了，手上插满了许多管子，变得好瘦，好瘦....每个手术都让她的身体状况变得越来越虚弱，ICU的房门大家都不想再踏入。最终大家都选择说了谎，处处隐瞒她的病情就是为了不要让她放弃。其实有些事情不知道比知道来得更好，对她说谎的舅舅阿姨们其实心中流了无数的泪。半年的生命时间，两个月的生命时间，短短几天内又缩短成两天的时间，半夜打来的电话总是让人提心吊胆。那时我好恨上天的绝情，一个机会让外婆说出自己的遗言也没给。

出殡当天的情景，回想起来就好像昨天刚发生一样。爷爷有高血压，变得好憔悴，总对外人说这结局对她是一个解脱，却让我看到他在后头偷偷擦掉眼泪，我知道他比任何人更不舍得。每当回想起那一幕，眼泪是无法控制的。

亲人离开总是件残忍的事，再坚强的人也需要时间面对。一年过得好快，外婆您不用担心，爷爷都有我们这些孙子陪着。以前他总是带我们去超级市场，每人给十块钱任我们买自己喜欢的东西，不时有带大家去剪头发，现在就换我们扮演当时他的角色。他现在都忙着自己的菜园，自创一些作品，去年还把他的作品展览出去，厉害吧？下午他都沉迷于台湾剧，我不时都会带他去验血，吃早餐，出去兜兜风。

人都是迟钝的，都需要靠一件事发生了才能让他人醒悟。而她的离去，一夜之间让我明白了许多，更珍惜家人相处的时间。不要等失去了，才大哭一场，责备自己当时没好好珍惜，那时再多的眼泪也不能让时间倒退。今世有缘成为一家人，就好好珍惜，因为下世未必你的人生故事里的演员们还扮演着同样的角色。

June twenty-fifth's diary :)

2011-06-25T06:00:00.000-07:00

..listening Touching Heart by SeeYa now. Oh my, I've got this song on the brain, that slushy emotional music. Have a listen if you love emotional song because it has plaintive melody. Kay, back to topic, last post was like a month ago. Hmmmm, busy and lazy.

But anyway, things are fine if don't mention about my work. Dad always said working is good, bla bla blahhh...You know, old saying. Well, the job is good, just i want to stop it with no reason. 'Just said you're lazy.' said mum. Ohh no mum, you're really my mum, nobody could read my mind except you. ;) Aiyoh, university life's coming soon, so should have holiday to relax and prepare some stuffs before go into jail life, right?

Tsk tsk tsk, korean infection, addicted on korean drama recently. Ohh yes, i'm willing to sacrifice my sleeping time to it although the next morning have to work. Dad said i'm crazy. I don't think so, it's normal to youngster having an owl life like me. And dear weather, i know you're hot, don't need to show off. Uhhh, It's HOTTTTT. You make me sick. :(

Oh yea babeh, today sick, take leave, FREEEEdom! So i plan to clean up my room especially wardrobe, floor, desk, window,....kay, is everything actually. :/ You know, my mum like to complain my things are in a muddle, tidy up your room please or you might at least tidy up your desk..... At first i'm very excited when start to tidy up my wardrobe. Mind's thinking: Nyehehe, clothes don't fit in, just throw, THROW! Then i can buy new one. But....... is nothing to throw in the end. Uhh uhh, dissatisfied. La la lah, next step is to bath they two and let them have a sunbathe seen sun's so hot and spicy today. Well, I know i'm a good owner. :DD Realized today just done wardrobe part, others no yet touch. Nevermind next time, dinner time reach, eat is more important. Bye people, bye saturday! :)

-看看自己的成长-

2011-05-11T06:51:00.000-07:00

人的成长过程，就像喝下一杯只加了牛奶的咖啡，有香甜，有涩苦，两种味道刺激着我们的味蕾，才发现人生的确很美好可是往往就会带些烦恼。我妈曾告诉我，人越大，看的世界就越宽，自己的要求，想法，愿望就越多。

就像小时候的我曾想当一名公共巴士司机，总觉得很威风，流氓不载，小孩老人免费。天啊，现在想起来，小时候的我好胸无大志，我爸就会说早知道志愿那么渺小，就不用花钱供你读书。嗨哟，都讲是以前，要不是你老婆在我小时候天天灌输我她以前小时候多可怜，要不是敢不上巴士，就是那黑心的司机故意把巴士停到离巴士站很远，让瘦小的她背着重大的书包追上巴士；有时候巴士满了，又得多等一轮.....就这样从小那是我的小志愿。那司机也真是的，像我这样善良的心也没有。

人越大，懂的事情就越多。多亏上天赐我那么多的难题，让我经历了不少事情，自然而然明白不少：考试的失败，是最常有；家人的离去，是最痛苦；可是家人的关怀，是最幸福；朋友的信任，是最难得。可是拜托，不要再赐了，因为我是一个不擅长面对问题的人。

人越大，吵架后就越难复合。小时候不是因为妈妈不让我吃冰淇淋而吵，就是因为做功课不小心过了朋友的桌子被骂，然后吵架，冷战一节。谁叫我小时候就患上了气喘，咳嗽数年，连医生到现在还认得我。小时候都是为了小事而吵，可是没多久，勾勾手，又成朋友。那时的我们，思想单纯又简单。可是长大后的吵架原因就不同了，就是因为思想比较成熟，觉得有必要吵架才会吵，吵后才发现是多么难复合。说穿了，还不是彼此都不肯踏上第一步。

人越大，要求就越多。当我第一次拥有一台属于自己的手机时，我可以开心到半夜起来看我的手机。可是人越大，需要的东西往往来的多。今天你有一台手机，明天你就会想要一台IPOD，后天你就会想要买一架DSLR。朋友说四年后，会驾一辆跑车给我看，拜托，这四年后再讲。把目标放高是允许的，可是期望不一定要占一百分。千万不要太炫耀，总是要留个阶梯给自己下台，在心炫耀就好。

人越大，就越无奈。就因为经历得越多，遇到的事情越多，越发现自己无法掌握命运，无法样样顺心，事不遂人愿，所以无奈也很正常。放心朋友，无奈是正常的。有个小朋友曾问我无奈是什么意思？无奈啊，这样的问题我也答不出，好无奈。流失的时间，别人的取笑，永远的过去，离你而去的亲人，不可避免的死亡，或者是离谱点的：突然倒向你的墙，让你就这样死去的，喝珍珠奶茶被珍珠哽到而死，都是人生好无奈的事。

.....人终要长大的。换言之，是自己慢慢学着成长，放慢脚步往后看看自己是否和我一样的改变。

-执著的故事-

2011-05-09T09:16:00.000-07:00

今天读了一编文章还真的蛮有趣，话中有话。整大编都是人生的问题，天啊，读完之后还蛮觉得自己的问题不少。做人真的太多东西需要顾虑，道理一大堆，问题不断找上门，头一天比一天还要大。有时候我就是需要话中有话的故事，才会发现自己的问题存在。

问你们一个问题，如果你家附近有一家餐厅，东西又贵有难吃，桌上还爬着蟑螂，你会因为它很近，很方便，就一而再，再而三地光临吗？我知道你现在心里会这样想，这是什么烂问题，谁会那么笨，花钱买罪受？

可是同样的情况换个场合，自己或许就做类似的蠢事。不少男女都曾经抱怨过他们的情人或配偶这里不好，那里不好，比如品性不端，三心两意，不负责任。明知在一起没什么好的结果，或许怨恨还比爱来多，但却不知道为什么还是要和他搅和下去，分不了手。说穿了，可能只是为了不甘，为了习惯，哪这不也和光临餐厅一样？

做人，为什么要过于执着？常想，有时候执著是一种负担，放弃是一种解脱。人没有完美幸福，永远都得不到一百分。知道自己没有能力一次拥有那么多，也没有权要求那么多，那就不要执著否则苦的则是自己。

以前也有听过一个故事，有一天，老鼠对猫说：我爱你。猫说：滚远一点！老鼠流下一滴眼泪走了；但是谁也没有看到，就在老鼠转身的时候，猫也流下了一滴眼泪，就是因为不要执著而放弃彼此。放弃该放弃的是无奈，放弃不该放弃的是无能，不放弃该放弃的是无知，不放弃不该放弃的是执著。

这不是单说爱情的执着，而是各方面。明知下了一段小雨，夜市巴刹不可能再营业，我还是会驾车去看，心想或许下完雨后他们又开始排摊，所以我妈常说我，不知听不明白还是不会听，就是硬要去看心才会满意。是固执还是执著？不，是太得空。:D

PENANG FU-UUUT!

2011-04-17T00:10:00.000-07:00

Hey, people! I have really, really neglected my blog for a long time. Well, recently i'm searching penang food from net that i have never try before. No dare to say out that i have studied in penang for year and half but never try so many famous food. So before i have to start my uni life in somewhere else, I MUST TRY.

AIS TINGKAP

In penang, we always go for ice kacang and cendol as our desert. I found a hawker stall called 'Ais Tingkap' or 'Window Sherbet’ because the chilled sherbet drink was sold over the window when it first started in Penang. It is a sweet red colour flavored (rose essence) drink chilled with fine shaved ice served in chilled glass with pieces of coconut flesh.

Rose essence, in my opinion mostly chinese people don't like to drink it. But for me, i can accept it for sometimes. Let me show you how it is made.

This drink was created in the late 1920's. Of course over the years, this drink has undergone some changes. From the information, i found that in the olden days, they used 25 different herbs and ingrediens whereas now they only uses a few. Why? I don't know.

But people commented that is true, very unique kind of thirst killing drink! So lovely so delicious. :)
As i know, this hawker stall is located in Tamil Street/Penang Road, beside Chowrasta Market. And it is closed on Sunday. RM1.50 per glass is a nice complement with all the snacks that are sold around there, worth la worth la!

ICEBALL
Seriously, I ate cendol in penang road a few times. But i don't know besides cendol, we can make a request for their colourful iceball. How come i just know it recently? Seee, as i said at beginning, i dare not say i'm 'penang ka'.

But iceball is seldom seen nowadays and was once a very favourable item and loved by many children. My mum told me she likes to eat when kid. And she said it does bring back old memories when she remembered buying this type of iceball, at only RM0.10 cents after school hours.
Last time i went there for cendol, i and my friends all just stand around the stall eating the cendol. And it brings me fun lot, i love the way. :)

Oooh my, i think it is fun then holding the cold iceball with my bare hands. This is the best when the wheather is like oven hot for now. THIS I MUST GO!

But now, one such iceball douse with sarsi and red sugar syrup cost RM0.80. I wish I could see more of this iceball around town. Okay, it's open from 11pm-7pm.

COCONUT JELLY
I have tried this before in my hometown and mum bought it from pasar sri rambai. She told me rm4 each, but if you want have a try in penang, the price i don't know. But rm4 for each is quite expensive but if you never eat before, must try. It's super duper yummy and i could finished whole one.

Inside, you will get the yummy coconut flesh but with less coconut water as some of it has formed into jelly. You will be surprise to find a large amount of smooth jelly in there. Wooooo!

It's located at Jalan Dato Keramat, and it's near my college last. I saw the shop before, i walked pass the shop before, one thing is I NEVER STEP IN BEFORE. Okay, i'm regret. The shop is open for business from early morning to late afternoon. Last time i passed by the shop, it's always full a lot of people standing while enjoy drinking their coconut drinks beside road. And it's hard to find parking, i tell you!

If you know where have yummy food in penang, i welcome you to tell me. Happy sunday, BYE!

HELLO, THURSDAY!

2011-03-30T09:51:00.000-07:00

HELLOOOOO, THURSDAY!
Dislike you so much, have to work on your day. Drama's time gone. Night market gone. -___-
On my way, i think we should work for 2 days and have 5 off every week for the same pay.

Well, i love exhilarating happening when working. Take for an example, had taught a four years old's little boy pronounced word of SWEET but he pronounced likes SHIT in the end. And when he read, sound's likes 'The cake is so SHIT! Oh My God, i love this kid so much. I want bring him home if wish. :)

A phrase 'Thankyou, teacher!' come out from their mouth can seriously turned my switch of mood into good mood. Kids, please say somemore next time! Hahaha. :D

But sometimes i think it's odd how people always notice when you come in late or leave early, but they don't care when you come in early, work late and/or work from home! Luckily i'm not, Hahaha.

Have to sleep. Good night, people!

Friendship is a tree. :)

2011-03-12T09:06:00.000-08:00

Within this holiday, i realized that life without friendship is like the sky without sun. Oh gosh, i can't live well without friends, seriously.

Sometimes i felt friendship is like a tree. It is not measured on how TALL it could be, but is on how DEEP the roots have grown. :) And it's always a lot of sheltering tree around me. How lucky and fortunate i am. HAHAHAHA! I think the answer is on me. Errrr....YESH i know, because i'm friendly :PPP

But sometimes friends are like stars, i can't ALWAYS see them. But well, at least i know they are always for me. Stick, master, mafia, poju yap, mrs.cheah, prince, potato, tomato, mumu, phey chee jie..... you should know who you are. :)

Many people will walk in and out of my life, but only true friends will leave footprints in my heart. Is that you?
Maybe you're, but maybe you're not. But it's okay, at least you did it in other people life.

Stars have 5 ends, squares have 4 ends, triangles have 3 ends, lines have 2 ends, life has 1 end, but i hope my friendship is like a circle, has no end. :)

Opps, is a STARRRR! Yeeeeh, whose nails painted with blue color, miss pang yours one ah? :)

原来我就是这样的我

2011-03-09T01:51:00.000-08:00

原来我就有那么的一个怪行为，我最讨厌起床后要我讲话。就算已经刷牙后，我也不喜欢。所以我爸常说，我这个女儿人很大牌，要等到她有心情时，才可以跟她讲话。

全家都知，没办法，我改不了。这习惯跟我已有十年了吧，还记得有一次，我刚睡醒，赖在床上，亲戚打电话来，表弟进来房间叫我听电话，我说了：跟她讲我现在不想讲话，等下再打来。现在想起来，还蛮难为我的表弟。过后，他只告诉我‘天啊，你这个人很奇怪！’‘是啊，可是在法律上是没罪的。’

....我这个人就是不喜欢重复。如果没听好，再问我，我就会说没事了。这点，连慧晶最了解我了，因为她就是那个总是让我讲没事的！:DDDDD

今天是我妈生日，所以今天我特别乖，不惹她，不出门！但其实我每天都是这样的，没什么特别咯，哈哈！本来打算今早要陪她去运动，可是六点半闹钟一响，脑海了想着一句：算了，明天再补回！又过了一年，但她还是老样子，没老到，反而越来越新潮，有时还真的不能赢她！说真的，她很喜欢拍照。你是最棒的妈妈，生日快乐！

好啦，我知道待在家白吃白住好有几个月了，明天就去做工咯！然后才有钱可以不时地去喝珍珠奶茶。 :)

二月二十六号的日记

2011-02-26T10:16:00.000-08:00

今天忙碌了整天，很累。
可是却让我明白了，原来我是最幸福的。

为了我，放下公司的工作，带我去。
为了我，没任何的理由下，陪我去。

睡了，晚安！

Is awesome trip. :)

2011-01-11T02:10:00.000-08:00

.......here again to blog something. :)
Holidays with Family will always a trip. The best feeling in this world is with family. Who say so, waaa! Is a special journey with full of laughter is all because this time i had spent my christmas with big family in indonesia.
....feeling is still excited although was the second time. Well, maybe mind keep thinking about shopping. But time flies just like a shooting star. *Phewww, finish journey, back to malaysia. Chehhh, not seen my studying time can flies so.

Now i only knew where is the BEST place for shopping? is Bandung, Indonesia! Factory outlet there just like a heaven for all lady. Branded products: Gucci, Guess, Polo, Burberry, LV.. The factory outlets is just along the whole road and you'll never see the ending of road, seriously one day is not enough.
Shopping mall in indo... Lohhhh, KLCC is not a competitor with it. Is the first time i need scan whole body before go in the mall. Can you imagine it? Spectacles will drop down if see that. The shopping mall is high class beyond words.

....And what i like the most is the sleeping volcano among volcanoes. It's was just awesome, but i hate the sulphur smell. The surrounding air is freaking cold but the water inside volcano is warm. Wondering why. :S One more is hot spring! I don't like the place so much anyway because it was crowded that time because of public holiday. Well, what i know is the hot spring is natural and famous. :)

Ohh ya, the money there is too BIG in value. Just like going for a toilet, need to pay 1 thousand rupiah but just 40 sen. And everytime i'm very confused when paying, so calculator is needed when the values came to 6 digits like 279,000. Hahahah! The funniest thing i realized is the car used for taxi in there is VIOS! Wahhh, is better than wira. :)
......Still a lot to say but because of lazy, i'll upload the photo in my blog afterwardsssssssssssss.

Oh my, i gained weight over the holidays...because i'm preparing for the role of Mrs.Claus for next year. HoHoHo! I love my holidays so much because i had a splendid holiday in 2010. Next stop, Thailand! Bye.

Kerting ♥ Pangkor

2010-12-07T08:49:00.000-08:00

Time flies, day pass and a new month approaches. Welcome december, bye november!

Wooh, within these few weeks, eyes saw a lot of beautiful things.

I ♥ 27 november because i had stepped on the sand of pulau pangkor finally. Yeahhhh!

Some of my friends said I live in paradise island when they saw the pictures of the island. Paradise or not, it is a very good place, a very neat little island here in Malaysia, on the north west coast. Have you been here?

On the islands there's a variety of wildlife while the smaller atoll are basically white sand beaches and rocks.

In the end, i fall in love with it. ♥ Because Pulau Pangkor is very well known for the white sand beaches, canoeing, jungle treks, bright stars, snorkeling, jet-skiing. What i like the most is crystal blue waters and excellent food, especially dessert. Hmmmm. :)

The beautiful scenery baffles description, the setting sun glorified the scene. I think the scene was always embedded in my memory.

In there, it's quiet and relaxing for us. But for my brother, it was just opposite. Because he can't bring his wife, miss computer along. HAHA!

In short, gorgeous and awesome! It's the ultimate Malaysian holiday destination. Whatever you imagine, Pangkor has it! Okie okie, maybe not for everybody because no disco's here. ;)

♥ without a word

2010-11-23T08:02:00.000-08:00

I should have done that. I should have ignored it like something i couldn't see.
I shouldn't have looked at you at all. I should have run away. I should have acted like i didn't hear it like something I couldn't hear. I shouldn't have listened to love at all.

Without a word , you let me know love. Without a word, you give me love.
You made me even hold your breath but you ran away like this.
Without a word, love leaves me. Without a word, love tossed me away.
what should I say next? My closed lips were surprised on their own.
Coming without any words..

Why does it hurts so much? Why does it hurts continuously ?
Except for the fact that i can't see you anymore and that you are not here anymore.
Otherwise, it's the same as before.

Without a word, i waited for love. Without a word, love hurts me.
I zoned out. I become a fool because I cry looking at the sky.
Without a word, firewell finds me. Without a word, the end comes to me.
I think my heart was surprised to send you away without any preperations.
It came without a word.
Without a word, it comes and leaves. Like the fever before.
Maybe all I need to do is endure the hurt for a while.
Because in the end, only scars are left.

Thank you, 404. :)

2010-11-22T10:13:00.000-08:00

...Finally i had leaved KDU after 1 and half year. Wooh! Although the time is short, but time is no importance when it concerns real friendship. Here, i met them. A friend is never a coincidence in my life, they are meant to enter my life to bring me joy and laughter. Yes, they are my 404' friends. :)

The times we shared is like a shooting stars, the time is short but it is really a lot of beautiful moments for me.
The memory....Walked out to eat during lunch time although under HOT sun. Bradon's favourite place KFC, laksa behind Giant, New world park, 5 dollar set lunch, wan tan mee.... Ahh ha! And our favourite's white curry mee.

We talked a lot during class, especially mr.radio. Eye stare technique is always used by we girls to transmit the news that don't want let the guy know. Shhhhh...Secret! Will pass sweets during class, is miss pang's job! Miss pang ah miss pang...
Though we're not spend so much time together, but friends' birthday we never forget. Wooh, i had ate a lot of cakes with you all in the end.

Every end of month was our death time, monthly test KILLED us! We hate monthly test, we hate monthly report that sent to home. But we still survive in the end. Weeeh! But after this, I think i'm gonna miss the time teasing a couple of mrs.cheah and mr.cheah. Will always remember 404's senstitive words: SHORT, DARK, BLACK. Miss our sitting place in the class, mr.cheah, happy not can sit with me? HAHA! No more chance i can dicuss people' profile picture with the girls. No more chance i can see my friends EMO in the class. No more, because it came to full stop. :(

Knowing them has made me happy in a million ways. The different characters carried by themselves had enter my life, because they are mafia, tomato, potato, off-white, stick, ju-on, prince, frog, mrs.cheah, mr.radio......
Friends are like colour pencil, and you all had coloured my life. Thank you my friends. :D

A place that never forget, fourth floor!

The friendship is not a game to play nor a word to say. It doesn't start on 8 jun and end on 16 november but it is yesterday, today, tomorrow, everyday and forever. I believe that distance never separates us. Goodbye and take care my friends.

♥ Starting today

2010-10-28T10:20:00.000-07:00

We had a date, I stood you up
You tried to call but I didn't pick up
See I forgot about our plans..
Please forgive your man for ruining your night so many times

I'm sorry, I know you're mad
And I don't wanna be like every other man that you've had
So I'm stopping all these childish things, girl, you mean too much to me
Your love is worth too much to lose

Girl, I know I broke your heart and trusting me is really hard
But watch how quick I change my ways.. starting today, starting today
I know that I'm the one to blame, you say every man's the same
But watch how quick I change my ways.. starting today, starting today
Girl, I'm starting today..

You're tired of playing the kiss and make up game
And I apologize for the man I became
If I could do it all again, I wouldn't hurt my best friend
And I'd throw away all my selfish ways

I'm sorry, I know you're mad
And I don't wanna be like every other man that you've had
So I'm stopping all these childish things, girl, you mean too much to me
Your love is worth too much to lose .

Girl, starting today.

In the end, i'm fall in love with the song. ♥

Tomato life D:

2010-10-15T06:41:00.000-07:00

Love has great potential to enrich your life.
But if you are just playing a role, pretending to love, it's only going to poison you.
Because you are teaching yourself that it's just a game, and slowly but surely you will lose the capacity to open in love.

They said we're too old to play hide and seek but given a chance, sure everyone willing do anything to hear someone say, 'I found you!'

And I found a nice-looking tomato when cooked just now. So bad, inside my stomach now. D:
Love is just like a tomato, it looks sweet.
But sometimes it tastes sour inside.
Yea, what can said is everything is not under our predicted.

Study, bye!

It's time.

2010-09-23T10:59:00.000-07:00

Tsamina mina eh eh

Waka Waka eh eh

Tsamina mina zangalewa
Anawa aa

It's time for exam. Gahhhhhhhhhh

My war was started today.

Stress continuous adding on me. Single, double, triple.

Afraid that i could not afford it all, 24 hours per day is totally not enough for me.

Sometimes felt that's not real me. But, no idea, no time to care this.

And i miss home-cooked food so much. Miss the time chatting with dad, just whatever topic. Miss my two little cousins. What can i said is miss everything in home. ;(

But not plan to go home yet, and my dad said he'll go find me on weekend. Noooooooooo, i'll feel more miss than that after they leave.

Owwwwwwh, tired. Gonna sleep, bye!

Is sunday :) :(

2010-09-19T10:52:00.000-07:00

Owh, how nice the day. My parent came hostel SPOTCHECK me. O.O
Brought a lot of food indeed, especially cake, mango, and Mooncake!
TOUCHHHHH. :)

How wish i can follow them back, then i'm sure my brother will headache again when see me. HAHA.
*Should give him a suprise next time.
Saw my dad purposely showed his funny expression when saying goodbye to me, i'm just cracked out laughing. LOLLL.
I like his expression lah, beh tong him nia.

How time flies, my sister had fly back to study today. Aizz.
No one will cooperate with me to tease my brother. Gone lah, i'm sure lose.
No one will help me tidy up my room when i went back.
Gonna fly to find her in this year end after my exam. *Excited.

Today was my grandma's birthday.
Suppose on this day, we should have a birthday celebration, but it won't happen anymore.
I miss her sorely everyday. :((((((((((((((((((((
Feel so sorry for not going the praying.

That's all, good night!

Complain study, show food.

2010-09-15T20:59:00.000-07:00

Indeed i can post up my blog yesterday night, but because of my careless , all gone. Arghh.
What to do now, retype! Gahh.

Recently had to force self wake up early, because how good of my lecturer keep adding extra class for us, caused my sleeping time cut into half. HALF! T_T
Just like yesterday, 4 hours chemistry continuous. 2 hours biology. :S

These few days, just our pre-u deparment student start study. Whole college very quiet, just two classes are switching on the light. People holiday, we study. And canteen's uncle also in holiday too!

Sometimes suppose should have an airy mood when listening music, walk to college. Just imagine, what an enjoyable! But BUt BUT if need walk under HOT sun, do you think still an enjoyable? Wheather is hot recently, just can feel contact lens will melt inside eye.

Love the evening most. It's windy sometimes. The road is quiet. Walking alone is nice. :)

I had stopped my food catering long time. Lunch, dinner had to cook with friends. You know la, i'm not a housewife or chef, the looking not very nice is of course but can pass at least. ;)
First try use mushroom soup to cook spagheti. Easier, nice and tasty!

We like potato, especially emily. ;)

We had try to cook chicken curry many times, but the taste still a bit weird.

Will try again on next!

Sometime lazy, cook noodles is the easiest and fastest way.

*Still wondering what should eat for later lunch, Ahhh, Delivery!

Okay, that's all. Bye!

I talk crap. :S

2010-09-05T10:18:00.000-07:00

Oh yes! Blogging is the way to let my mind relax.
But no words can express my stress now.
No one could understand. T__T

You said me changed, i'm not agree. I smiled a bitter smile. :S
But now, i realized what you meant.
Duih, you should understand i'm forced to do that.

Okay. Have to hit on books again.
Good night people.

Blahhhh!

2010-09-03T12:11:00.000-07:00

Good morning people, is 3.00am now.
My brain is temporarily out of function. Body is low in battery. And all because of chemistry's fault. It killed my every brain cell in every second. T__T

Screamed when a lot of question mark appeared inside my mind. Pulled my hair when i can't find answer after thousand tries.
Ee kho will just ignored me and called me 'Shut up lah, siao zha bor!' HAHA. :D
*I can sure after my exam, my hair will become less.

I hope i can have a off dayyyyyyyyyyyy!
Wake up late. Watch tv while eating snack. Talking nonsense topic with friend. Watch pps. Movie marathon. Go night market drink bubble milk tea. Go mamak eat roti canai. Just want do everything in slow motion even brush teeth. Can i?
Can, dream later Tan Ker Ting.

Today had spent my whole day in library with master, Ju-on! :)
*Hit on books.

.....until nobody left. Because it's time for library to close.

Ahhh ha! I had found my two watches finally. Gooooooooood!
Okay people. Is time to sleep, good night :e

First step.

2010-08-27T00:38:00.000-07:00

Sometimes you had to tell yourself that you have already decided, that nothing can stop you now.
But if the step backwards is so much easier and safer than step forwards, what will hold you true to your path when the going gets tough?

Think it, sure a lots in your mind now.
Well. For me is family of course. :)

Sometimes, the right thing to do is to take that first irreversible step, the one after which you cannot go back. And now, for me, is one of those times.

Decision is only wishful thinking until you take that first irreversible step.
Well said easy, do it diffcult. But at least we should have a try, right?

One day, when you knew how ur path should going on, i'm sure you will love your life.
And you will feel like today better than yesterday while tomorrow sure will better than today. :e

Ohh, Study time! Bye.

Gloomy. :/

2010-08-15T03:59:00.000-07:00

Everything is not running smoothy around her within the two months. :/

She hate 21 July forever.
How sullen in her heart when had to view hospital from hostel everyday. Tears welled up in her eyes when recall back a poignant memory. :'(
The truth, if you ask need how much time to accept it? Then you will get NO answer for that.
Unwilling to accept it.
But well, everything had over. We are okay. Too bad is just we can't back to the pass anymore.
Thanks my coursemates and friends which hold me up always.

I had spent many nights to complete it, and she showed a thumb up with a smile to me. :)

也许因为天注定，我们是快乐一家；就是因为缘分，我是您的孙子。一大家三十余人口，约十七九个是您的孙子，奶奶，或许你是最幸福的那一个。

Ya, the next! I get the As result finally. Just like SHIT!

It's 6 and 7.

2010-07-14T10:28:00.000-07:00

Is JULY. Is JULY. Is JULY.
What i'm waiting for when the month comes to my eyes?
Sure is the sixth day. *eyes blinksssss.
I love the date because it's simple number. Simple just like me. Againnnnn?
Simple just like me! Winks. ;)
Is in buoyant mood whole day. Is playful. Woootss. Can you felt it?

Was received a lot of wishes from friends when the day was started.
Birthday songs, wishes, cakes, presents. Thanks all. :p
Heah hooi jing was in KL. How bad she can't spent my day with me. *No thanks for her.

A thousand of awesome, sweet, crazy moments with the fellow. Just imagineeee it.
I had spent my day with college' friends. The funny moment were we're lost on the way to raja uda.
How come? GPS was crazy on that time.
Why? Maybe it is in bad mood, i think.

And we went there for....

A place i went for many times, but this time was different. Even people, environment or feeling.
A place that full of a lot of memories for we, 404.
A place that gave my stomach full always.
A place that finished up my day there. It's you, SOHO.

They gave me a suprise birthday celebration. How was it?
My name was called from DJ while i'm busy talking. And emily just like 'hoii, your name ah!'
I was pop-eyed with amazement. Mind thinking: Is my name? Goshhhh!

Awwwwww! A birthday song was suddenly played. All people there wheeled round in amazement too.
Candle's light came nearer and nearer to me.
Who'd have thought it? Wooooo! Amazing moments.
I love the moments. Can just the times stop at the moments?

The shock left me numb. :S
Friends, thanks everything you all done. I love the presents so much. Kumawo. :))

Thought everything had end up on my day.

But not yet, the plan still going on.

The next day, when i decided to take my bag and going home, BUT when just opened the door, i heard a birthday song.

Shock! Shock! Shock! Nothing to say. What's going on?

Turn and see, a cake was at there!

What you all done brought me a wide, a sweet smile.

Was touched beyond words.

Was nineteen, no more eighteen.

The last teen years, no more teen years next.

I had heard a lot people said it.

NO! Is wrong. I still have plenty of teen years to go as i like.

Who care about age? Just ignore it, because i'm still young. Wooh!

Hope everything on me will always fine and smooth and to whom 's viewing my blog now. :)

What to write? Something happened around. :p

2010-06-29T07:57:00.000-07:00

FINALLY! I'm free to blog.
Recently always went hospital after class. Everyday just the same. Is tired sometimes. But grandma's smile caused my tiredness fly away. Yea, is worth for me.

Even sometimes i could take my own leave and stay at home, i still need to take care cousins. Is Three! Three!
Was mum's order and i had no reason to reject. Because mum and aunt had to go hospital to take care my grandma. What can i replied to her was Yes madam! Yes madam! What a good daughter.

What to do. Step by step. In the end my own time gone. Pheeew~
Early morning had to wake up early for their school. But they always wake up early than me. Good!
Indeed they scared i can't wake up. I had told them, don't worry, my mum will morning call me. One morning i had received 2 morning calls from their mum. And i slept back. Yawnnnn.

Prepared lunch. Instant noodles can or not? NO! My mum will kill me!
Fetched them go tution. And they are in different times different places for tution. WELLLLL!
Dinner. One want eat noodles, one want eat rice. Sorry, no choice for them. Follow me. HAHA.
Anyway they are cute. *If they don't fight out.

Ahhh! One more to talk!
Yesterday i felt my dad is CUTE. Is the conversation with him.

Dad: Later i bring you go McD eat, okay?
Me: Don't want. I'm still full.
Dad: Why? Go la. Go la.
Me: What's wrong with you?
Dad: Because i want collect the coca-cola glass.
Me: HAHAHA. But i don't like to eat set meal 1. 5 dollar charge if you want me eat.
Dad: Okay. I paid all. If can, go eat many set as you can. =.=

And today i had eat at hostel and get the glass.

Is M-unit gathering again. Blah!

2010-06-25T23:52:00.000-07:00

Wootssss. Is kerting write about marketing unit's event.
Gathering again, success again!
Well, this time attendance is great except xuan hong absent. He's having exam while we're having gathering. We deliberately want. He's going to kill me if he saw this. ;)

What to do. Same as usual.
A moive watch : A-team. That is an interesting movie. Some more talk about movie? Ermm. Yea. I know why hee chiew always mentioned that they are A-team. LOL.
Dinner at nottern beach. How nice of the scene while the sea is asleep. Football watch? Want but time are not allowed.
Shopping plan FAIL. How dissapointed for we girls. :(

This time, we had an overnight stay at gold coast resort. Thanks to birthday master, chuo ying.

The view of skyline is at once awesome. Grand. The beautiful night scene regaled our eyes. Woooo. :)

At first, we planned to give chuoying a suprise belated birthday celebration. Believed that he will shout "Awwwww! It's shock!" like mad when saw us suddenly took out the cake and song for him. Unfortunately we FAIL. And he just like ' Aiyaaa'. What a funny response he gave. HAHA.
We cheerrrrrr!

How time flies! Tik tok tik tokkkkkk. Is the next day.
They went for swimming. For me, sleep is the most important. heah hooi jing too.

I missed the time we 4 girls crowded in bed by sharing blanket together. We talked, we laughed. Ahhh, we talked about ghost story. What can i said is snug, comfortable and warm. :p

Oh, how nice the gathering! Marvelous! Looking forward for the next.

I feel not good. In my heart. :'(

2010-06-20T03:34:00.000-07:00

Is sullen because had not ample time to sleep. Mind was in a tumult whole day.
Dejected after received call from mum early morning. It gave me a shock to be told grandma was seriously ill and she was sent to ICU midnight.

Everyone seemed downcast after heard grievous news. But what can we do? :(
It make us down. Everyone looked tired in hospital.
And i'm unhappy. Seriously. *Want shout loudly as much as i can. Ahhhhhhhhhh!

The feeling when step in ICU is how pathetic! I hate it.
She had operation today and she tough enough. A thumbs up for you, grandma!

I still remember you told me i'm the grandchildren who easy to coax when i'm small.
You laugh at me but i like. Tell me more when you recover. I'm waiting.
Stay tough, because we need you.

I'm feeling blue today.

Our beloved miss lim

2010-06-18T00:21:00.000-07:00

BLUE. I'm blue in mood morning. And she seemed very downcast. T__T

Was the last day she teached us. Our beloved miss lim.

Appreciate the year, the days, the time you teaching us. Is inspiring us.

Miss your reminder a lot. *Kerting, remember do pass year! *Work harder, get a good result next time.* To Find Out this... *How do you all think, try and see. *Dont' forget exam coming nearer. Remember study!

Ohh ya! You don't like student late in class and last year i'm always the student. Come on, i stay hostel and still need walk so far, sure late. Can forgive want. *Grins.

A thousand times she said, a thousand times i heard but i fail in promise always. How bad. :(
I hate the exercise you give but i like the break time you give. XD

You raise us up. You give us a great support. You give us a smile whenever we're in desperate on difficult question. Unfortunately, we don't have a chance to sing a song for you. But we really praticed in class yesterday. Nvm, next time! I din't pratice well yet. :p

I had no idea why she resigned her post. But i hope she will have a bright future next. We'll miss you and waiting you to come back visit us.

Thanks teacher. :)

The days after exam. :)

2010-06-16T05:18:00.000-07:00

My AS exam was finished last thursday. It's bring me a wide smile on my face. :)
But there's no holiday for me. So, a frustrated look on my face. :S

Like what i said in facebook " People holiday, I exam. After exam, people still holiday, but i start class. It's killing. T__T

But at least i had done some from what i want.
An unforgettable time with the girls. A big K room and whole cinema hall. Awwwww! It's totally our day. Junie cheong, we really enjoyed the time with you together. Your tomata egg! I want eat! I want eat!

Had a non-stop eating at Town Steamboat with yee en, wei lin, hee chiew and wei xin.. It's the funny moment what can i said. Thanks for help me to carry my stuff.
Jogging with the fellow. I can wake up early! Movie Movie Movie! It's nice. XD.

Ahhhh! One more.
I went back to secondary school for campfire. Gather with scouts and had a lung talk whole night. I had really awesome moments with you guys. And i can't wait for next gathering.

Ohh. It's time for me to cook dinner. Bye